English textbook from China

The translation is in sinees.

Learn how they talk in Eingnd.

Bratant bootregging!

First lesson:

How To Learn Eingsh

1. Find all Eingsh letters:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
2. Write each letter on a piece of paper
3. Put the pieces of paper with letters in a bag or a box
4. Shuffle
5. Put any number of papers from the bag on the table next to each other

Happy Eingsh!

Just so sick of all the Engrish and Chinglish in China. I want to have my own version.

Ein-Zwei-Drei-Gsh!

AKA Scrabble for Dummies.

The author learned it by txtng with his American frnds.

The natural language shell for Lunix.

Mst B 4 shrthnd rtng & rdng.

And I thought the American edjucation system was dumbing down.

Well, it’s Englishish.

WHAT WAS THAT SOUND?

Eing… That sound like some country Gulliver failed to visit. Land of the Unicorns? (german Einhorn, originating in the surname Eingorn).

A german friend asked me what “gsh” was…

The word gets 2640 Google results!

“It’s a cook book!”

You consciously eingsh?

Let’s gramr and spelng!

Hungarian textbook from China is titled ”Hush”

Eingsh= anguished English.

They do better at Mairdn.

Allow me to translate the Chinese words on the book cover:
Number One Teachers College of the Hunan Province
Basic English (IV)
Editor-in-chief: Yau Leung Chan

Yes, this book is for Eingsh teachers.

Special Christmas edition. No “L”.

NOW WE EINGSH

“Hey, my name anagrams to ‘Sing, eh?'”

— From an upcoming episode of Ask me Another

The guy who did this must have been a real Engstein.

@jjhitt: perhaps more like the unnatural language shell.

One Gsh??? Mt dictionaries suggested “gosh” = donnerwetter.

Ergo: one Donnerwetter.

Nein. Das ist verrucht.

@72rd Is that the sound of your gears clashing on a failed racing gearshift.

1-2-3 **GRAUNCH*#*!!

What we have here is a lack of communication.

@Johnnytbone Yes. A Frankengstein. (Alberts brother)

I cna nwo wiert Eingsh peeryfctl

My Eingsh grandma is pervert.

Know I wheel try my speiling. I have a knew spilling checquer that stops me from mekong any missed steaks.

editor: the book costs too much to sell; take out a couple of vowels and consonants from each word; they won’t be smart enough to notice

will learning eingsh make me smrt like homer simpson?

Learning Eingsh leads to whirled peas.

Time to change the name of this website I think.

Is that a pair of upside down underpants in parentheses?

Is actually deutsch

Honesty at it’s best . . . that’s supposed to be a textbook on English (!!)

It’s actually German. “Ein” is the article and “Gsh” is a cacophony word for utter incredulity. Since they merge words together you get:
Eingsh, tweigsh, dreigsh, viergsh, fünfgsh und so weiter.

By the way, happy April Fool’s day!

Yeah, sounds funny enough, but they will never be able to start a rival site Eingsh.com!!!

Let’s learn Eingsh.P.S.The publisher sucks.

Ruuuuu

From the same company as my Esapñl book.

Let’s grammering with “ME”!

I feel bad for anyone who has to learn English in class out of this textbook…

Now I’m bi-lingueiol! I pate meseilf on baiuck!

But it’s Chinese English. At least that’s what you’ll be told.