Best alarm ever!

Comes with a stick.

The C should be a N

I tried sending them a fax to order a wack up but couldn’t get through.

The night manager is a wack job.

Which button do I push to request a young ho?

So, the whack comes from below? Ouch.

@DnT: that would be the “Domestic Operator”, but you need to use your in-room “fax” for that.

The valet can also have your car polished – wack on, wack off.

@DrLex: That would certainly fail the balls.

For every sex calls, you get a free young Ho.

Prease contact Receptionist to be alarmed by our telephone.

@DnT: Boh’t!

Attention guests: This is a timed event.

There is nothing like wacking up at the clack of dawn.

“Eeeeyaaaaaa…Wack up, you lazy guest!” (beats hotel guest severely with bamboo pole at 5AM…)
“Ow, ow, I’m up, KATO, you fool!”

(Apologies to Inspector Clouseau)