This dressing hurts…

And rge thousand islands

Let them down gently

OW! My head!!

Slicing a head of lettuce leads to a splitting headache.

@webmaster: How about: Let me put a dressing on that.

Not surprising; it’s raw.

Why is it hurting? Just ‘cos.

– Waiter! This lettuce is in pain!
– You should see the lamb you ordered, Madam…

Comes with a salad scream

As a kid, I was tortured by spinach…..

Sore lettuce needs releaf.

It was given a pinch of salt.

Aw, lettuce alone.

You’d be too if somebody bit into you.

Would you like some fresh opium pods in your salad, Sir?

Twenty years ago or so, Atlanta, Georgia had a salad restaurant called:
“Lettuce Surprise You”.

Painfully silly name, yes.
Oxycontin anyone?

So that’s why the salad always leaves.

@Pete: You think that’s bad? Look at this:

https://www.leye.com/

The lettuce has to go back to its bed on arugula basis.

Revenge of the lettuce:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbAohexT0Ho

Pain is just chlorophyll leaving the body.

Poor lettuce! It got slugged in the garden.

Maybe it’s time to put the lettuce out of its mizuna.

That screaming sound, is a carrot in extremis.

Dearly beloved; Lettuce spray.

Et tu Brute – Julius Caesar Salad

After that Sausage Party movie, I’m not surprised that it is.

Sounds like a 90s grunge band.
‘Lettuce In Pain’
Probably sounds like Screaming Trees crossed with Alice In Chains.

Lettuce put some dressing on that raw lettuce.
Perhaps with a miracle whip?