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Documenting the Engrish phenomenon from East Asia and around the world!
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Glory Model
Ya know, it IS pretty soft to look at…
Photo courtesy of Elizabeth Giles.
Change machine found at video arcade in Hiroshima, Japan.
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Looks great but what does it do
And buttons to push as well
Who are they selling to? Are there competing change machines in the same arcade?
Please insert the pleasant feeling and when the pattern light indicator reaches the green light, you will really feel the utter glory.
90 percent fewer fatalities than experienced with Glory Model T-800.
Duct tape: ‘Merica, Japan, the Universe.
I know wavy, I’ve seen wavy. I’ve been wavy. This aint wavy.
Not so glory when it shortchanged me!
Or you can try the Mediocrity Model, which is cheaper.
If you think the change maker is glorious, wait ’till you try the divine pin-ball machine.
This machine does not actually change your money. It just takes it and makes you forget about it with its soft wavy front panel and blinking lights.
Soft to look at. Hard to English.
Instructions:
1. Insert coins
2.
I think this machine rep resents nothing.
Sometimes it gets self-excited and you get running light indications and bright pattern even without inserting any coin.
Change is glorious. Don’t remove the duct tape or won’t be glorious.
This machine resents pleasant feeling; it has a rep to protect.
No, no, no. His name is FitzChivalry.
Also called ‘Slut Machine’
Function! It actually neutralises Pachenko machines, by making the balls freeze, and go nowhere while the red light is on.
he object? To drive the nips insane.
CORRECTION: Insaner.
No Marum. It is actually a Battery Changer. You insert your flat batteries, and instead of doing something boring like recharging them, it turns them into Anchovy Pizzas.
YUMMM!
HEY TOJO! Can I sell you an hyphen.
Corection: I think it is Pachinko. (Not sure)
Is this where you insert *insert your favorite translation*?
FROM THE OFFICE OF THE COMMISSIONER FOR INDUSTRIAL RELATIONS
29.10.2014
Dear sirs,
we have had a complaint from your Machine Rep. wherein he claims that you have publicly inferred that he is a surly curmudgeon.
To whit: “Our machine re[ rp resents pleasant feeling”… and so on.
He strongly contests this assertion, and is claiming compensation. As you have circulated this assertion worldwide, he feels that it will impede his chances of being employed anywhere in the world. In fact, he asserts that well may be unemployable.
We await your reply.
Yours Faithfully,
Deputy Commissioner for Industrial Relations.
It is so soft to look at that it need duct tape to keep it from fal
ling apart.
Where is the hole?
Does it say ‘Ni’ or ‘Ptenng’?
What makes the panel wavy? Maybe it’s the winds of change.
Insert money to see the running lights change to driving lights.
Some jerk put tape over Glory Lock. How am I going to stick my Glory Key into it?
I, too, resent pleasant feeling, when bright pattern is involved.
If you don’t want to do it For fun, Do it for glory! No items, Fox Glory, Final Destination.