I’m glad I came?

I’ll leave my foul stuff at home.

Hygiene regulations at the Engrish Inn…

I am gonna come to the mattresses defense here and say, hey that mattress didin’t meant to fall down! It was the immodesty of the guest that did it!!!

One night here and you’ll feel positively honorific!

You gotta invite your right….to party!

You DON’T have to call the cops…my mattress just fell down the stairs, I swear.

Mongolian invaders will attack mattress that fall down, defend it with your life!

Honorific. Sounds like a word the president would use.

All your visite are belong to us.

Engrish and legalese are confusing enough on their own…put them together and this is what you get.

ATTENTION Honorific Guest: You now work here. Check your soul at the door.

Linan Inn. Where falling mattresses always have enough lawyers.

Of course I’ll defend the mattress that fall down! It’s not HIS fault; he didn’t know that he had such a strong reaction to alcohol…

In other words: “Please use a tissue instead of a towel…”

In other words, yo’ mama don’t work here!

The English translator equivalent to a waiter spitting in your meal.

I am honorified to be damaged by ined of foul towel, with down falling of mattress. Conservationing of fowl watering is to be of niceness. Personally, if I get indemnified, I’m going to the bank! With complacency!!

There’s a number of support groups for fallen mattresses… sadly, too many feel that they cannot reach for help.

Zeeeeeeeemmmmm!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“I am taking little rest, please don’t disturb or hurt me” -matress that fall down that need defend.

Defend the mattress or what? you’re gonna punish it?

MATTRESS DEFENNNNDERRRR!
Freeing the world from sleeping on concrete!

It’s bad manners to not appreciate your damaged towel results.

Hi, I’m here to defend mattresses with Narcolepsy.

faclities…..LOL!!!! That sounds wrong, man.

Please to come help! Mattress that fall down result ined that and not can get up.

I’m curious as to what sort of “immodesty” on the guest’s part would lead to a mattress falling down.

I am taking offense to many of these comments, my mother was raised in a home for fallen mattresses….

Indemniflcation…? That’s going straight to my handy dandy words-that-sound-smart-but-have-no-actual-meaning dictionary!

Diagram this sentence. I dare you.

“Fallen mattresses”. THERE’S a cause to fight for! These poor mattresses need our protection!

But I already Indeflicated!

“going to the mattresses”, has a whole new meaning to me now

maybe me no stay Hollendeize Inn this year. Much rather defend inmemniflied mattresses that fall down. I cherish conserving energy conservation.

I solemnly swear to uphold justice, fight for the weak, defend the mattress………

Please thank for let use to down mattress furtherovermoreunderly defend against procedure do check out.

Thank cheers.
Tom.
Very Gay emotions for indulgent satisfied consumer

Ninjas are after my mattress!
OR
I’ll invite my right. My wrong is no longer welcome here.
OR
Please only fall down modestly.

God, I love that sink!

I disagree with what the mattress says, but I will defend its right to say it.

we dont supply water or power and on thursdays the mattress gets a little tipsy so if it falls down please take it back to your room.

Defend matress please with live

So essentially they’re saying ” please masturbate quietly on the floor, in the dark, with a tissue, and only wash up after you’re finished.” Am I correct in this?

LOL. I study English, but I don’t know what the hell is going on in this text 😀

Hmmm…well, considering my recent hotel stay included the option of using the “o’clock room” and there was a “for a good time call” add in every room, then I guess I can understand why there are damaged towels, foul stuff, and the need to defend the mattress.

Because of Monkeys!

I won’t defend that matress! It was his fault!

Most Honorific Host,

Will I be complacent defending mattress fall down. I wish cherish the taking care of using toothpaste. But I no be understand what you mean by enjoy visite. Scary weird translator guy suck. Towel too damaged be perfect too.

Visite-or

The matress better pay well for me saving its life…

The horrific use of commas in this sign sickens me

I shall defend this mattress with my life….*brandishes sword*