Add sugar for more diabetes.

I’d prefer a tea without the health problems thanks

…….. insert your illness here

Bring your own pick and shovel.

Don’t drink it in the mountain and you’ll be fine.

Made from real natives.

Every packet of tea comes with a 15% off voucher for health insurance or funeral home of your choice! Hurry, while stock and your health/life last!

Most tea brews well enough in a pot. Getting a mountain into your kitchen could be problematic.

And here I thought only the deep South knew how to make sweet tea properly.

Steep price to pay for that kind of tea.

That explains why First Nations people have much higher rate of diabetes, heart diseases and suicide. thank you.

Native Tea In Sea
Effect: Drowning

So it’s basically just like Mountain Dew.

I swear, these random drops just keep getting worse with every patch…

The evidence against this native tea is mountin’.

Non-native tea in the plains give you diarrhea and heartburn.

Nothing beats ‘The tingling fresh coffee which brings you exciting new cholera, mange, dropsy, the clap, hard pad and athlete’s head. From the House of Conquistador.’

Contains chicken pox virus.
Effect: Type 1 diabetes if you’re really unlucky.

We’ve secretly replaced this customers’ tea with our new mountain tea; let’s see if he notices the difference

At least they’re honest

Leave the crap in the mountain….For all I care.

Yep, sounds just like Wilford Brimley.

Also, working in the tea mines causes black lung.

I’ll stick to sniffing glue, thanks.

Sounds good. What can I take to get cancer?

Diabetes and high cholesterol run in my family, but maybe I’d better take some just to be sure.

The drink of sumo wrestlers!

Sponsored by Coca-Cola Company.