They caught me on paper-towel theft…

Well when you’re on a roll.

Used or unused.

To thievery or not to thievery; that is the questionable.

Paper-towel is an endangered specious in Hong Kong.

Round up the usual spects.

They’re also running low on hereby and to wit.

! Paper mache guards will be posted !

It has come to the attention of the relevant authorities that a discernible depletion of paper towel provisions within the confines of this designated washroom facility has – ipso facto – occurred. Subsequent to preliminary inquiries, a reasonable suspicion of illicit appropriation has been substantiated. Therefore, let it be unequivocally proclaimed that any individual or individuals found to be engaging in the unauthorized removal or misappropriation of paper towel or any other such provisions will be subject to immediate reporting to the appropriate law enforcement agencies, without exception or prejudice.

That’s PRC for you – use the free paper towels but be prepared to pay the consequences.

Specious: “superficially plausible, but actually wrong.”
Sums up this sign pretty well.

The whole world’s on fire, and these people are in an uproar about their paper towels stolen…