Nation destroyers will not be tolerated.

In your own time of course

So ISIS has reached this far

Sure, if I see some nefarious villain just seconds away from pushing a button that will destroy the nation . . .

. . . I’ll be sure to write a strongly-worded letter to Po. Box 11 Koh Samui and advise them of the situation.

I’ll expect a reply in 3-4 weeks.

Oh yes, by all means, mention the three-digit emergency hotline AFTER the two longer numbers that also need an area code to work.

Nice to see our tax baht at work.

Dear PO Box 11,
HELP!
Faithfully Yours, Crime Victim

In case of emergency, write quickly.

CAUTION: If you accidentally find any policemen, do NOT notify any drug dealers, drug sellers, etc.

– Mommy! I found Mr. Hilter!

Dear Po.Box 11,
I found an accident. I tried to take it with me, but it didn’t fit in my car.

Sincerely yours,

Dear Koh Samui police,
I’m writing today in regards to the U.S. Congress…

Drear Koh Samui Police;
Help! Someone is trying to kil……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

I reported a crime and got a “Get out of caning” Free card.

Dear Koh Samui Police,

What’s the difference between a drug dealer and a drug seller?

The king is a wanker.
……………………………..With all due respect of course.

We will get round to apprehending these criminals….When we get a cool day.

We regard all crime with apprehension , but not necessarily urgency.

Brissie police are not much better.
I rang to report a crime in progress. They were far more interested in getting my details than doing anything about the crime. (The phone call ended up costing me $22.00)

Next time I will either take action myself, or let it pass. 😯

In fact. To waste even more time, the dopey bitch on the phone, went through all the details three times.

We are keen to arrest those who destroy accidents.

Dear Koh Samui police station,
I found a drug seller. Should I send it to you by parcel post, or will you send me a policeman in a plain brown wrapper?

Dear Koh Samui police station,

I just discovered Magneto is looming around the street corner. Please arrest him.

Thanks
X-Men

I had an accident in my pants. Does this qualify?

@Marum | 8:34 am | . Well that’s just buggered up your next trip to Thailand

Dear Koh Samui police station,

I just jaywalked.
Thought I’d let you know.

Hello, police? Target is having a two-for-one sale on Zantac. Just thought I’d give you a heads-up.

Dear Koh Samui Police Station:

There is a murder in progress on my street. Oh, wait. They have uniforms on and they are looking my way.

Never mind.

Just Minding My Business

Somewhere. But definitely not on my street.

Dear Koh Samui Police. I wish to report an Origami Course by correspondence I paid for. I was unable to get the first assignment into the envelope. Have I been ripped off?

@Algernon. Hehe, you got it. A few years ago an Australian women got herself locked up in Thailand. When she couldn’t get her own way, she staged the usual screaming match. The officials warned her, that by criticizing the workings of their department, she was insulting the king. So she suggested they “stuff” their king. They responded, by locking her up for a couple of weeks, until she developed some manners. Women get away with this nonsense in Oz. If you ever take one to court, the first thing they claim, is that you acted in a bullying manner, and… Read more »

Dear Koh Samui Police:

I caught a ton of nation-destroyers around the world. Can you help me?

Signed,
Random UN Peacekeeper