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Documenting the Engrish phenomenon from East Asia and around the world!
Engrish.com - Because of Monkeys
Give me your hand, I need to wipe.
posted on 2 Aug 2011 in Clothing
I’d be happier if your hands weren’t so cold…
Photo courtesy of Bonnie Veronico.
Spotted in Takadanobaba, Tokyo.
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Frozen Hand — In your freezer section.
Times were tough at Cryogenics Inc. So tough in fact that they embarked upon their doomed ‘Ice Lite’ campaign, which allowed customers to freeze only part of their anatomy. Equally poorly thought out was their T-shirt drive, which predictably increased sales of kleenex but did little for their own bottom line.
Method for happy times to spend:
1. Find a hand in your neighborhood
2. Freeze near the hand. No flu
3. With the hand, wipe away a slurrv from a beautiful person
4. With the same hand, wipe tears
5. Hand wash
6. Happy!
And don’t forget: FFORT IS BEST!!
No, your honour, I can assure you that my advances were nothing more than an attempt to wipe the plaintiff.
I’m sorry. Your Happy Time is overdrawn.
Another Bumbac ego trip…
The Hand in the Addams family is the best hand to wipe away the … you know…. after happy time.
It looks like Master Yoda’s T-shirt shop is doing well. “A happy time you will spend. Buy my T-shirts you will.”
(A short test, intermediate level):
Freeze, wipe, weep and …
a. get on with it
b. get up with it
c. get away from it
d. get away with it
I have to admit I did get a little misty-eyed last time I wiped a beautiful person.
Frozen teardrops
Engrish personal relations tip #339: If you can’t help freezing your hand, at least do it far, and if you have to wipe someone, make sure they’re ugly. Otherwise it’ll all end in tears.
Beautiful person or not, it still brings tears.
When I wipe, I prefer to do it in private.
Give me your hand, my eyes are getting puffy.
Remind me never to play scrabble with this guy……
They’re all going to the ffar canal.
Ffort is best. A lot easier than effort
“F” for Ffort!
No, it’s not perverted. I want to wipe her TEARS!
We spent a happy time and then I accidentally wiped her out…
♪ Why can’t I free your doubtful mind and melt your cold cold hand? ♫
FFORT IS BEST but English is completely haywire. Good luck with that, Japan!
I know why he is freezing his hand.
He is the world masturbating champion, and he is suffering from Tendonitus.
CHARLIE MURPHAY! what did the 5 fingers say to the face?
No! I will not wipe other person’s ____ !
We always knew ‘e’s were bad which is why ffort is best Frozen Fingers Only Remove Tears???
Now turn your head and cough.