Tower Rules

Being drunk and insane is permissible as long as you look presentable? I guess Charlie Sheen’s all set then.

It’s so hard to walk through all this baleful biology…

Does a mother-in-law qualify as baleful biology?

I love the smell of effluvium in the morning.

It all makes sense to me except for the picture of a can of Lemon Pledge.
Is dusting forbidden in the Tower?

“I’m sorry, sir. You’ll have to leave your sword with the security officer at the front desk. You can pick it up on your way out.”

I’ll rap myself in plastic then before entering

Excuse me, where’s the cubage of liquid machine? My liquid article won’t accept examination without it.

We’re having bangers and match tonight, followed by baleful biology in an effort to clear the pollution from our inner environment and produce much cubage of peculiarly smelling effluvium.

My germs don’t bite. Can I enter now?

Look closely at the photos.
I can see prohibiting “articles which can destroy and pollute the inner environment”, but why single out Lemon Pledge?

No interlopers? Oh well… Aunt Bessie, you have to wait here, we’ll pick you up on our way out.

OK, guys! Who cut the effluvium???

Sauron says ” No Effluvium in the Tower ! “

Drunk, insane, and not properly dressed is no way to go through life, son…

Spider Man not allowed to enter. Spider Man climbs wall of Tower to top

Sounds like the rules for the Tower of London.

At they stopped discriminating against sufferers of the crazy disease.

So lets see…tinder, restrictive blade, electric appliance……well, looks like my sub-machine gun is clear to go in with me.

But honey, please leave the microwave in the car.

Tower CLOSED: An Insane and not properly dressed person called in a banger threat. Tower must be checked by the Exploder Squad.

Och laddie! Can I noo bring in ma Haggis.

Many are the people who have succumbed to disease caused by baleful biology.

Ooooohh, MOM, can we pleeeze visit the epidemic area? ……What if I promise to leave my sword in the car???

Furries who are on the wagon can even skip the line.

Back in the day we were only casually punished.

That’s a Tower of Rules.

Hey, wait a minute. With rule #1, I can walk in if I am properly dressed, drunk, AND insane! Awesome. On my way.

May I bring my Rubik’s Cubage?

You are baleful biology! Get out!
Ah, geez.. sorry..

“Thank you for your understanding” …
I never said I understood you… and so on

Wow, I actually learnt a new proper English word on here: Interloper!

AH, so that’s where the snake who escaped the Bronx zoo is hanging out. Sneaky snake!

How dare you bring your religion into the tower!

It means that us, The Knights Who Say ‘Ni’! may enter the Tower with … the HERRING!!!!!

You are under arrest, seriously,

We will do our best to provide security for you. Comprehensible English? Sorry, not our game.

What if the interloper had a sword…

You’ve posted what appears to be a past incarnation of the sign a few years ago, at https://engrish.com/2009/11/entering-the-tower/ . I’m wondering now if both signs still exist, or this one replaced the old one. Evidently, the “baleful biology” phrase still persists.

In my opinion, this is more like ‘Notes for NOT entering the Tower’.

“So… do you guys have banger-check or what?”