Chapter 1: Foreplay Communication

Chapter 1: Foreplay Communication

posted on 27 Jan 2010 in Books/Magazines, Chinglish


Photo courtesy of Christopher Daniel.
English textbook found in Hainan, China.

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Spoony
Spoony
14 years ago

Say it, don’t spray it.

Luke
Luke
14 years ago

Hey honey, I’m just going to throw some burgers on the grill and then we can have hot hot sex with all our neighbors.

Algernon
Algernon
14 years ago

Not in front of the chiklren

mindance
mindance
14 years ago

modern–and definitely in english–version of kamasutra…

venomlash
venomlash
14 years ago

No wonder those people look so happy!

KinkyTom
KinkyTom
14 years ago

Is that a sausage in your bun or are you just happy to see me ;D

Lollerskate
Lollerskate
14 years ago

“Oral Sex: Talking before doin’ it”.

SF
SF
14 years ago

To take you past “wham bam thank you M’am”

Koeter
Koeter
14 years ago

“the fine art of dirty talk”

Ralph Hamilton
Ralph Hamilton
14 years ago

NNoddy. Social intercourse, is NOT screwing in groups.

Ralph Hamilton
Ralph Hamilton
14 years ago

No Noddy (edit)

jjhitt
jjhitt
14 years ago

“Nice buns…. Nice buns…”
“Can I get you a beer? Can I get you a beer?”
“Would you like sauce on that? Would you like sauce on that?”

jjhitt
jjhitt
14 years ago

You can lick our sauce, but you can’t beat our meat.

jjhitt
jjhitt
14 years ago

If staring at my spatula makes you smile, wait until you see my baster.

Big Fat Cat
Big Fat Cat
14 years ago

Not available in California.

Big Fat Cat
Big Fat Cat
14 years ago

Lesson One: What the Fxxk !

beechoak
beechoak
14 years ago

Not your average “patio talk”…

beechoak
beechoak
14 years ago

When you said “there’s a party on my Big Deck and your invited,” I thought you had something else in mind…

beechoak
beechoak
14 years ago

edit “you’re” [sigh]

beechoak
beechoak
14 years ago

Modern Living Magazine for the Young Urban Professional Amish of Lancaster County, Pennsylvania…

Globe Trotter
Globe Trotter
14 years ago

Intercourse Communication???

Before: PLEEEEEEASE
During: MMM…UGH… OOH…. AHH
After: ZZZZZZZZZZ

Grifter
Grifter
14 years ago

Let’s get right down to the point we’re dating…

Blaze
Blaze
14 years ago

$50 up front, cash.

What?!?

Karmas girl
Karmas girl
14 years ago

Chap 6: You Learn Make Happy Now

coffeebot
coffeebot
14 years ago

BILLYBOB: And then what happened?

SKEETER: I communicated with her!

BILLYBOB: heheh… uh… heheh, communicate… heheh

SKEETER: heheh

Adam
Adam
14 years ago

Learn how to work your way into that person’s bed.

mRn
mRn
14 years ago

That’s good .. atlast i get to pursue my career on a subject i really like

Chris
Chris
14 years ago

That guy is really flaunting his deck

BeadyEl
BeadyEl
14 years ago

Rule#1: when you are hard, do not forget a smile.

cmakeng
cmakeng
14 years ago

For 20 dolla, me luv you long time.

tami
tami
14 years ago

“I don’t know, he’s a bit anal.”

stan
stan
14 years ago

Drink Drinker, drunk drunker, have intercourse communication, then smork.

Thuggy D
Thuggy D
14 years ago

Intercourse: The Best Kind of Communication!

Salome
Salome
14 years ago

You awake?

jjhitt
jjhitt
14 years ago

Go to Dalian University of Technology to learn Intercourse.
Go to Mabel’s Cat House to learn TCP/IP Networking.

Jay
Jay
14 years ago

Intercourse communication is good, but don’t talk with your mouth full.

Ralph Hamilton
Ralph Hamilton
14 years ago

Also. The bloke on the right, seems to have brought a rather large package to the party.

Pete
Pete
14 years ago

Student, reading part of Dialogue A on pg. 23 in drill book: “Show me your unit. You’d better be packin’, buddy boy!”

Student, looking up from book: Shenme ya? Wo zhen kan bu dong ah!

Bob*
Bob*
14 years ago

How do you greet somebody at night?
“Good evening”

How do you greet somebody in the morning?
“Will you call me?”

skyhack
skyhack
14 years ago

Can we talk?….

Chuck
Chuck
14 years ago

Talk. The other four-letter word ending in “K”.

MSGangsta
MSGangsta
14 years ago

Can’t we just cuddle?

Izzie
Izzie
14 years ago

I bet the students actually volunteer to role play the dialogues in this text!

Lora
Lora
14 years ago

Boy, the stuff that doesn’t end up on Adult Engrish sure still can get away with a lot!

DavoPavo
DavoPavo
14 years ago

“Put the weiner in the bun”

vineclimber
vineclimber
14 years ago

Hmmm… does “get up, get up, get up…. wake up, wake up, wake up” enter the “communication”?

Randybabay
Randybabay
14 years ago

Yes honey I do think she’s old enough to learn about the birds and the bees and this book well teach us how to talk to her about it.

Chaosweaver
Chaosweaver
14 years ago

Isn’t there an app for that yet?

Lalala
Lalala
14 years ago

Talk hanzi to me baby

John Swindle
John Swindle
14 years ago

Let’s intercourse with lao wai!

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