Tired of seeing?

* proven to be marginally effective on average and low quality eyes.

It w0n’t hurt, pr0mise!

Eye’m afraid that eye really quite adore my eyes. Even though eye have really crappy eyes, and eye need meye contact lenses.

They already have those, they’re called ice-picks

For those really bad blind dates.

Just in case you thought you learned brail for nothing.

Works everytime. See for yourself!

But the mascara stays on!

Finally, a way to avoid bad ads on TV. Can you put your eyeballs back in place though? Or do they get dissolved?

Why do you need such a big bottle???…After all…you can only use it once.

Results you can see!

That is such baloney—now i just can’t see colors–liars

The eyelids kept protesting…

Doth thy right eye offend thee? Hate all that plucking? Well, no more! New Eye Remover from Perfect makes self-mutilation a snap! Tired of doing what your mother said would make you blind with no results? Eye Remover from Perfect gets the job done with far less cleanup after. Try it today. *Be sure to read all instructions BEFORE application* *May cause blindness*

“See ya later bro.” -“Nah, man, you won’t.. that’s for eyeing the last piece of pie!

the perfect remedie for after you walk in on your parents after one too many beers

Use this to have the best excuse to leave work.

Great for nude beaches.

If you call now you will also recieve the ear remover! perfect for those large conversations!

Maybe Edgar Allen Poe should have used it for that screepy old “vulture eye”.

Put that away right now! You could poke someone’s eye out with that!

Hey! Have you seen my eye?

Oh, they’ve come up with a cure for things I can’t unsee!

Sometimes parents know what they’re when they tell us we’ll poke our eyes out.

Hey, the North Koreans could use that for interrogating prisoners!

The closest thing to eye bleach you can find!

read carefully before use it, if not, directions in Braille available at extra cost…

Tired of unsightly sights? Not thinking clearly? Do you see the demon in the faces of all the children? Then why not remove your eyes? If you’re not perfectly satisfied then send the product to the address written on the back for a full refund. If you can’t find it then we know we’ve done our job!

since my husband’s been cheating on me i think i’ll buy a penis remover to go with it.

In just six weeks your eyes will shrink to slits.

Remove your annoying eye today!

can be found in body remover shop

the perfect eye remover, a collaboration of Dolce & Gabbana, kim jong il and kim il sung..

ideal gift for your hated great aunt!

I CAN’T SEE!! HELP!!

I, Oedipus, endorse this product.

“Should I tear my eyes out now / Before I see too much…”
-Sufjan Stevens